Don't destroy "man"hood," embrace it

I'm going to confess that most of this content was originally intended for the last blog, but I realize that I went on a tangent here that could be enough for its own post. In my last blog, which dealt with genderless language, I asserted that there were better ways of making change in gender violence than altering the language.
Granted, most feminists do understand that changing the way we speak would only be a small step in progress. Most of them realize that our culture, mass media and entertainment industry is creating most of the negative stereotypes. I agree with them in many areas of this debate. For instance, they are adamantly opposed to the pornography industry, because it is degrading to women. They are also against certain negative influences on men, which I agree with to some extent.
LGBTQ rights supporters and feminists alike are opponents to the stereotype of men (in this blog, I'm only talking about male stereotypes here, not anything to do with women, so calm down, ladies) being strong and aggressive (because it generates homophobic and sexist tendencies). This is where I begin to take an issue. While they see the aggressive tendencies of males attributed to societal issues, I see it as natural. That is, I believe men are inherently more aggressive, due to higher levels of testosterone. They believe that this aggressiveness is the root of most sexual assault and abuse. I think I agree with them here, but their solutions are substantially different from mine. Most of the LGBTQ/feminists I have met believe the way to correct this problem is to remove aggressiveness altogether. I strongly disagree. I believe this aggressiveness should be embraced, but channeled.
While they view figures like John Wayne, Rocky and Rambo are negative because they support the notion that a man must be strong, I see these characters as paragons for manhood. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a man who is courageous and strong. this may sound harsh or insensitive, but I don't care if some males are hurt because they can't live up to the stereotype of what is "manly" (as long as "manly" is defined by positive traits). Being "manly" in our society has a lot of merit. Physical aptitude needs to be praised, and it is good for boys and young mean to have ideals to live up to. Sure, not every male is as tough as Brett Favre or Bruce Wayne, but the qualities of these heroes are much more praiseworthy than those found elsewhere in society.
The problem with our society is much more complicated than these feminists are making it out to be. They think that removing the ideals of "true manhood" they will cure most sexism. In reality, all this will do is further confuse kids even more than they already are. I guess a lot of this stuff comes down to parenthood more than society, but I would hate to see a world that praises a bunch of soft men with no assertiveness.
Kids are already growing up in a world with many conflicting ideas. Regardless of what their parents are teaching them, they are involved in our cosmopolitan society where they, too, are granted access to all the Internet has to offer.
Through MTV young men learn to idolize rappers who glorify disrespecting women, drug trafficking, and gang violence. Actually, not just music videos but the reality shows are terrible too. If it's on MTV I'd assert that it's probably not a good influence on kids. A funny example is Michael Scott's "Date Mike" character in the Happy Hour episode of The Office. Of course this situation is mostly a made-up joke for the television program. However, it is sort of satirical for our society. Reality dating shows and crap like "Jersey Shore" do dominate our culture. Our youth are berated with both subtle and patent offensiveness. I think if you want to clean up relationship violence, you should probably start with the crappy content that our music, film and television industries are producing.
Give our boys better role models and they'll treat women better. We need men. I'm seeing less and less of it in our world, and it's sad. Like I said, a great proportion of these issues stem from parenting, but we as society need to think about what kind of environment we are creating for our young boys.
In conclusion, yes. Some men need to get their act together and respect women. Yes. We need to carefully consider what ideals we are encouraging. But no, we should not remove the "manly" stereotype. Instead, let's give our young boys good role models and ideals to live up to. There's a fantastic blog called the Art of Manliness that encourages men to return to the old ideal of "manliness." I have not read everything on this site, but I recommend most of it, if not all of it.
The world needs men.

Oren out.